The Journal of Sundry Wonderments

What Would You Do With a Time Machine?

      I realized that the longest posts on here are those about history. I suppose that makes sense, since history took so long to happen.

     As a historical reenactor people often say things like, "I bet you wish you could live back then." I usually reply that I prefer living in a time where good medicine is available. A regular source of clean, fresh water is a plus too. Some people suggest that I would have liked it better 500 years ago, back before the white men ever came here (they mean that my native side would like that - 500 years ago many branches of my white side were oppressed peasants). Personally I like the guns they brought (by 1675 the Ojibwe people had more guns than the British, French, Dutch, and Spanish combined - this is known by trading post records), the iron kettles, and tin lined copper kettles (it sure beats a birch bark basket heated up with hot rocks from the fire - also although we were already copper workers, we didn't make eating or drinking vessels out of it due to copper poisoning, and we didn't know about lining it with tin to make it safe. The Europeans had only just learned that too. For centuries they were poisoning themselves with copper, but blaming it instead on acidic foods and things like the tomato). I also like the knowledge they brought on iron working (by 1700 there were Ojibwe, Algonquin, Ottawa, and some Iroquois blacksmiths (smithys) scattered all along the Great Lakes Seaway - although there were iron arrowheads and spearheads made before the white invasion, these wee made from meteorite pieces, and were chipped, and not worked with a forge. However, since we knew already how to forge implements of copper, learning to work iron was only a matter of learning how to get our fires hotter).
      Also, unlike other native nations, the Ojibwe lived in lands that were colder and swampier than other parts of North America and it was hard to farm, so consequently we didn't suffer much white incursion until it became socially unacceptable to just chase us off. Our treaties are treaties between two sovereign nations sharing the land, rather than a conquered people's treaty. It also didn't hurt that some of our native neighbors who started a war or two with the whites also happened to be our mortal enemies. When the wars came we fought our old enemies. I won't say that we were allies to the Americans during these conflicts, because we weren't. We just so happened to be fighting the same enemy at the same time. For that reason we got better treaties. It's only recently that we've learned how to get the most from those treaties.

      Back to the matter of traveling back in time. For the sake of the family history on my white side, maybe I could go back to about 1888 or earlier and see if there was anything that could be done to change events in Germany. If Fritz (Kaiser Friedreich) could have been convinced to stand up against his tyrannical father and go ahead with his plans to establish a constitutional monarchy (based on the one established by his mother-in-law in England), then European history would have been changed forever. World War 1 would have still been unavoidable, but the battle lines would have been drawn up very differently, so there would have never been a Versailles Treaty, which therefore would have never given rise to a maniac who promised release from that treaty in the form of the Nazi Party. Besides, if the monarchy was still in power under a constitution, Hitler would have just been executed like any common, rebellious traitor, and that would have prevented a whole host of trouble. And besides all that my family would be living a whole lot better than we are right now.
      Nevertheless, this is really just a happy thought, because unless Fritz's constitutional monarchy could have been so firmly established to be ready to go, that it could not be reversed, all efforts would still be in vain. Fritz spent his entire reign of 88 days as Kaiser in a hospital bed with cancer, and with his angry young son assuming control. That's quite a hurdle. My great-great-grandfather, his sons, and others who tried to help with establishing this would probably have still been either killed or hunted down till they came here to America anyway. Besides, this was during the Victorian Age (called the Empire Period in other European cultures), and was a period that I just hate. Just being in Europe during this time would have gagged me like a maggot. Other than the fact that they lost absolutely everything (and they really had a lot to loose), I think my Great-grandfather and his brother and sister were happier here in the deep woods of Northern Minnesota.

      However, if I had to pick a time to go back to, for me it would be the beginning of the Neolithic - with the knowledge I have right now. The Neolithic was one of the most exciting "hinge" periods of history (the 17th Century is fun, because it is also a hinge period - between the Medieval and the modern world - they had both swords and armor, and guns). The Neolithic's first advance was the development of mass agriculture. Providing everyone with enough to eat, so they were not spending all their time looking for their next handful of food, allowed them the time to think of other ways to make life better. They thought of things like how to build better houses that would last more than a couple of years. They learned how to make pottery - first to store things in, and then later for a variety of purposes. They had time to make their boats better. They made art. They learned how to make cloth, and how to dye it in the same way that they used to dye their leather with just a few minor changes to the process.

One of the first cities

They accidentally learned how to make a reddish-orange metal out of the light blue rocks out of which they carved talismans. It would have had to have been an accident, because they would have no reason to throw their precious light blue rock in the fire. I amuse myself with the image of someone wearing one of their copper carbonate ore charms around their neck while working over the fire, and watching it with horror as it slips off their neck into the fire and melts into a puddle before their eyes. Whoever this was probably tried for a long time to hide this incident. Finally though, the secret was out, and the Copper Age began.

Copper ore

Beads made from copper ore

All copper in the Old World was smelted from ore. In North America, however, there was an abundance of 98% pure copper found in veins throughout the South Shore of Lake Superior in Northern Wisconsin and Upper Michigan. There was also the phenomenon called "float copper." Something happened in the formation of this copper that made it so full of air pockets that it floated on the waters of Lake Superior. As late as the early 1970's people on board Great Lakes freighters still reported seeing it. It eventually ends up washing ashore. The Copper Age actually began here before it began in the Old World. Nevertheless, they needed help from wayfaring travelers to get the ideas of mass agriculture, but those travelers came pretty early. They came and joined the Solutrean-Asiatic blood mix some time before the founding of Jericho (but that story is reserved for i different post - or three). Something kept happening here in North America though, that destroyed our civilizations, and kicked us back to the Stone Age. At least three times in very ancient history, the cultures here advanced to a point that rivaled those civilizations of the Old World, with Mass agriculture, copper and even bronze working, and systems of writing. Every time, something caused their civilizations to utterly collapse into the dust of the earth, and caused the people to live once again from hand to mouth, never even knowing where their next meal would come from. At least along the Great Lakes they never forgot how to work their copper, and they never forgot how to make small, subsistence gardens. More on these rising and collapsing civilizations, and my theories about their collapse is also material for a different post.

Copper and bronze plates with writing unearthed during an archeological dig along the Missouri River

If I could go back there with nothing more than the knowledge I presently have, I could do quite well. My present knowledge of surgery, could combine with the Neolithic knowledge of natural medicines to extend life spans greatly. Neolithic cultures know their plants way better than a modern botanist. Sure I could make copper and bronze before anyone else, but I also know how to make a magnet, and how to use that magnet to find high content ferrous ores. In my little civilization I would just skip right to iron age technology. Foundries would be made of bricks made from clay. Also, after finding some sulfur, I could make some gunpowder. HOWEVER, these techs would be NEVER used en masse, but just enough to get by. The civilization I would create would remain very close to nature, almost hidden away in the deep parts of the forest, and guarded from the surrounding, much more primitive civilizations. The techs would be guarded too, and since the primitives would view them as magic, we would let them think that they are indeed magic. All these techs would be just for the survival and comfort of our society, and would not be exploited or exported The civilization would be a lot like the Elves of Tolkein's world, or the world of folklore. Who knows, maybe I did go back there - those legends had to come from somewhere. Now that would be fun.

All kidding aside, if I had to go back to any time, it would be the Neolithic. Below are a few videos about this hinge period we call the Neolithic. The first one is fairly short, humorous, yet still informative. the others are each part one of a series that will take you quite some time to watch, but they are awesome. If you like this sort of thing, you will be back here a few times to finish watching them all.