A Truffala Tree; Really? 

      There is a public service announcement playing on TV that is just heinous.  What makes it especially wrong is that it is put out by the U.S. Forestry Service.  I don't know if you've seen the ad, but it begins with an animation sequence that is out of the world of Dr. Seuss, from "Horton Hears a Who" I think.  Then the announcer asks, "Have you ever seen a Truffala Tree?  There is a place where you can find lots of them - the forest!"   By this time I either hurry up and hit the mute, or my ears automatically close off, as my brain refuses to hear any more.

      Unfortunately though, I have heard the remainder of the ad before.  The announcer continues to talk about how there are many things you can see in the forest, how it's such a great place and you must go visit it some time.  While this is being said, the animation has a lot of Dr. Seuss type creatures are running around, building pyramids with themselves, and singing in harmony.  This is what you will see if you pull yourselves away from your computer games, and get off your dead keester and go out to the woods for a change.

      Then of course they have a web site to go visit, so you can learn how to go outside (to the forest).  It's something like "visit the forest dot org."  Maybe the web site teaches these couch potatoes and Halo and WoW addicts how to put one foot in front of the other till soon they are walking out the door.
      I'm sure that they have good reasons to deceive the children of America.  Childhood obesity and the diabetes that goes with it is at an all time high.  At the same time funding for the forests, public or private is at an all time low.  That might be because interest in the forest is also at an all time low.  They are so desperate to get kids off of their couches and away from their keyboards, and out to the woods, that they feel they must trick them into doing so.
      Dudes, the ends do not justify the means!  You are going to give these kids a warped view of life in the woods.  They are going to be out there looking for a Truffala tree.  They will be looking for Dr. Seuss animals who sing to them and just see squirrels who chatter squirrel curse words at them from up high in a tree (that is NOT a Truffala tree).  There is no such thing as a Truffala tree U.S Department of Forestry, and you know that (unless the education for a forestry degree has gone down hill in that last several years - maybe you don't know that), and you shouldn't tell kids that there are. 
      Some kids will want to go see this Dr. Seuss land and will attempt to go out there without supervision.  They'll go crashing through the woods, and being inexperienced out there, they will get twigs in their eyes, trip on roots, eat the "pretty" berries, and probably get lost.  Maybe they'll think they can have a nice conversation with a smiling, singing rattlesnake, or a water moccasin (depending on your locale).  Maybe they'll think they can go play with a cute, cuddly bear cub, and learn the hard way that their momma doesn't like that (maybe that's the intent - get rid of couch potatoes the Darwinian way).

      Maybe I don't like this because when I grew up the forest was only a few hundred feet from our back door.  I had already been out there as young as a year old as my mom was picking various wild berries in their season.  When I was old enough to go there myself (about seven or eight) I was already told how to find my way out if I got turned around, how to look for land marks such as certain hills, creeks or tall trees, and what berries are edible.  I was taught how to go from tree trunk to tree trunk to avoid an angry bull moose, and I was taught that bear cubs aren't cute, and they won't sing to me or play games with me, but that at first site of one I should leave immediately before their mother saw me.
      I spent many, many hours out in the woods alone and with my brothers.  We ran along the deer trails, jumping over lower branches, and ducking under higher ones without ever breaking pace.  We crossed swamps along the ridges of beaver dams.  We cut pieces of diamond willow to make canes, walking sticks and other crafty items.  We built "forts" - various types of shelters.  We loved it out there, and we still do, and we never had to be tricked into going there by someone telling us it was like a Dr. Seuss land.
      By doing this U.S. Department of Forestry, you are teaching kids not to trust adults, because they lie all the time.  Your forestry lie will just be filed away along with the Easter Bunny, Santa Clause, Tooth Fairy, and other lies.  To quote myself from an earlier b'log entry, just like a bunch of marauding Vikings, you do more harm than good.
      Maybe you could have an ad that tells kids to go visit abandoned warehouse districts, and tell them that this is Halo Land, World of Warcraft Land, or Medal of Honor Land.